We Are Being Governed by Imbeciles, Vol XXXIV

Remember the economic crisis of 2008? You know, that big deal where the banks imploded and your 401K was cut in half and millions of people lost their jobs, sweeping Obama into office with a 2/3 majority of congress on his side, all because banks, particularly Fanny Mae, were giving mortgages to people that they knew would never be able to pay them back?

Don’t look now, but it is happening again.

In a sane America, all the executives of Fanny Mae would have been put against a wall and shot back in 2008, their families sent to labor camps in Alaska, and their estates salted that nothing should grow on them again. But the problem is that Fanny Mae is a quasi-public agency, essentially the private banking arm of HUD and certain liberal congressmen.

People were always upset that no bankers went to prison for causing the 2008 meltdown, but the bankers were not only not breaking any laws, they were also doing the wishes of the government.

The new program allows a person with no conventional income, enough ready cash to afford a 3% down payment, a 680 credit score, and a guesstimate of how much he can borrow from his friends and family (what used to be known as mortgage fraud) to now buy a home.

It is fucking insane.

Fanny Mae doesn’t think it is insane because:

  1. Housing prices always go up, so if the poor sucker who takes out one of these loans can’t pay he can always sell, pay off what he owes, and walk away.
  2. Fanny Mae is backed by the government, so it isn’t like real  money is at risk, just taxpayer money.


  1. As we know from 2008, housing prices do not always go up, sometimes they in fact go down. They usually go down after a housing bubble. And what causes housing bubbles? Why, it is the idiots at Fanny Mae throwing around bad loans. When the inflated house prices drop, the poor sucker who took out one of these loans is fucked for life, along with all his poor sucker neighbors who fell for the scam. Even if the housing prices do not drop, default is by no means a pleasant experience: it is stressful for families and wrecks credit.
  2. I can’t even.

Now, I’m sure the politicians pushing Fanny Mae into this think they have nothing but the purest of intentions. I’m sure they are convinced that it is a good and godly thing to lure poor people with horrible finances into taking on massive new debts that they cannot possibly pay, setting them back even further, and in the event of a general drop in housing prices, ruining the global economy.

Blessed, blessed are the politicians; they shall never be held accountable for their sins.



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